It's so easy to dwell on the challenges of the past year. Thinking about how my M.E has worsened and whether this new state my M.E is in is now my new normal or how my FND has progressed with new symptoms developing and the difficulties I've had at times to access care like the migraine clinic that I've been waiting to see for about 2 years. Then there was the surgery I'm desperate to have an I could have had it but I need to have it in an NHS hospital as I need ITU/HDU on standby due to the complexity of my needs and no one can tell me when my surgery will happen. Then there's the dwelling on how the following year will be and the challenges I will undoubtably have to deal with ahead of me.
Dwelling on the challenges and negatives is so easy so what I've been doing with my therapist is thinking about the positives of this year no matter how small and also what I've achieved this year. This has really helped me to see this year much better; it doesn't take away the challenges but it's made me see things in a different and brighter way.
So, what's been positive in 2021?...
- The first thing is how I've exceeded my goal of getting 100 subscribers to my YouTube channel. At the time of typing this it's not the end of the year yet and today checking on my channel I have 128 subscribers!
- I've also exceeded to number of books I planed to listen to/read on my Good Reads reading challenge.
- I've supported and participated in different opportunities. I've written articles for both the M.E Association and Action for M.E and also supported and been part of some of the campaigns they've run this year. I'm now an M.E Champion Blogger for the M.E Association. I also have become and ambassador for the Chronic Warrior Collective and joined their Extra Card Crew and supported their work.
- I feel so much gratitude towards my friends and pen pals for all the messages and mail I've received this year.
- This year I finally got a care package after years of trying and I now feel supported by our local adult social care service. I have a very good social worker, and a fab PA. Plus also in my care I have some good doctors and my link worker from the Social Prescribing team is great. Also just recently I've been assigned to a lovely advanced nurse practitioner from the 'Chronic and Complex' (which is how they alway see me when I'm in hospital) team who's supporting me with my care. I feel that in terms of my health and social care the past few months my care and support has really come together finally and getting this care I feel more positive about 2022.
Projects and things I want to do in 2022...
- I what to buy things from smaller or independent shops as much as possible more this year
- I want to commit to my photo journal
- Also I want to stick with my 1 Second Every Day project and come up with some creative video clips (as my life isn't that interesting which I think is why I stopped last year)
- I want to finish my BSL online course
- I would love to learn how to braid my hair
- I want to continue growing my blog and YouTube channel
- And finally hopefully I'll have my surgery soon and some extra PA's too!